Day 30: Glory

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

In the morning, you
glory — unfurling into
full bloom at sun’s light.

***

A common flower,
not showy,
persistent in your travels,
wending, winding,
climbing, sometimes binding,
easy to overlook
the glory of your
persistent opening 
to the light.

You prefer a balanced soil,
not too much light —
12 hours will do nicely —
lest your bloom curl inward,
shriveling from toomuchsun.

Your cousin opens
to the moon,
unfurling in the dusk,
basking through the night
until touched
by morning dew. 

I am opening
to an inner light,
a radiance, a spark
of glory
born before i came to be
and now unfurling
in words
and images,
and tenderness.

Day 29: Starlight

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

Blue skies of morning
blot the starlight from my view;
still, the stars shine on.

***

From dust you have come, 
And to dust you shall return.
~ Genesis 3:19

We are made of stardust,
every part of our body
formed in stars
over billions of years
and multiple star
lifetimes.

We come from dust
and to dust we shall return.

All my ancestors,
near and far,
came from the same dust. 
Our skin tones are different;
sepia, olive, charcoal, lily white
The beat of the drum
to which we dance is different;
bodran, sammi, buffalo hide, goat skin
Our origin stories are different;
cave, sun, breath, moon

Regardless of color, drumbeat, creation story —
our bodies themselves,
the skin in which we live and breath and move,
are all sculpted from the same clay.

the invisible starlight 
of my morning
reminds me
i am made of stars
reminds me to 
shine on

Day Fifteen: Fog

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

Sometimes the path fades
into a covering fog;
we see just this step.

***

Above the valley
a low bank of clouds
cover the mountain’s peak.
The mass of rock
emanates a brooding
invisible presence,
strength and power
of a deity
beyond human imagination,

A path rises
into the fog,
stone steps
ascending
into the mystery.
The steps below 
fade from view,
the steps above 
yet unseen.

Only this step remains,
the broad, flat stone
upon which I stand.

Day Fourteen: Sweat

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

Sweat: smelly and wet,
we apologize, hide it.
Still, *life* hard-earned.

***

Wash it off,
cover it up,
close those pores
with unfortunate chemicals.

Sorry, we say,
I’m dripping wet,
we say.
Don’t get too close!,
we say.

Here it is.
Life. 
Hard work.
We stretch our muscles,
birth a baby,
till a garden.

Sometimes
the sweat on our brow
Is the price of words
that will not come,
an apology
long overdue,
an unspoken grief,
now gushing forth unchecked.

The work of our life,
this life,
is not meant 
to be easy.

Day Thirteen: Landscape

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

The landscape I see,
birds swooping, leaves fluttering —
the stirring of life.

***

I chose the place I sit,
the space in my dining room,
in front of the glass patio doors.
Instead of a place to sit and eat,
I have a place to sit and see —
birds coming to the feeders,
native grasses swaying in the breeze,
an old cottonwood at the edge of the field
stark silhouette of bare branches at sunrise
before it leafs out into the fluttering
of the broad leaves of summer.

Here is my laptop
for writing,
my art supplies
for creating,
a candle 
for appeals to Spirit,
a sachet of lavender 
for soothing.

This is my hearth,
the center of the landscape
that is me,
human arriving,
Saoirse becoming,
beloved on the earth.

Day Twelve: Kinship

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

[Note: experimenting with the extended form of haiku called tanka]

Gathering to me
the ones who see me, know me, 
listen to my words,
listen to the heart beneath,
listen to my brokenness.

***

He was gone early.

A night of sirens,
Weeks of hospital gowns,
And then the day
My mother came home 
To tell us he was dead.

For decades I was alone. 
Too much for my angry mother,
Too much for anyone, really,
Including the young girl
Who wanted one thing only,
To crawl in the lap of her absent father
And feel that embrace
Once more.

I tried hard
To be okay,
To find the love I needed,
To be worthy.

The winter was long
And cold
And harsh.

A glimpse of spring
Now and then. 
The beauty of autumn
A temporary balm
For the soul.

Just now,
In the autumn of my life
I begin to feel
The kinship
Of the ones
Who are gathered,
Who are here,
Who are listening,
Feeling,
Caring

for me

I’m beginning to feel the ease
Of being held.
Some from the past,
Some in this moment,
Some from a time to come. 

I am caught in a web of love.

Day Eight: Harvest

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

[Note: experimenting with the extended form of haiku called tanka]

You may harvest peas;
I’ll eat your peas with gusto
While gathering words,
Simple words plucked from stardust,
Reflecting a woman’s soul. 

***

It is the time of planting.

A long winter forestalled
The excited dropping of seeds
In the turned ground,
Re-discovering water spigots
And long hoses,
Tiny hand-written signs
To map the anticipated
Crop of green shoots.

I am planting poems,
Harvesting the words 
Dropped into the
Fertile ground of my being,
Tending the flow
Of desire and imagination,
Discovering the map
Of my heart.

Let’s set a table
Together.
Your leafy greens,
My tendrils of thought,
Entwined in conversation,
Sating our appetite
For belonging.

Day Seven: Chill

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

Early morning chill,
Warming sun not yet risen,
Birdsong not yet heard.

***

The sky to the east
Lightens slowly,
A magic time for
Slow breath,
Quiet mind,
Grateful heart.

The Blue Hour,
It’s called.
Not quite dawn,
More twilight
As the sun still lies
Deep below the horizon. 

Vibrant, deep,
“Sweet light,”
Soft light,
A time of tranquility,
Meeting the chillness
With my favorite fleece.

Day Six: Survival

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

I count survival
as the-best-I-could-do then.
In this time, I live.

***

little tree
still alive
still leafing out in spring
as if your skin did not split
after an early freeze
then peel
and fall to the ground
leaving no cover 
for your soft white inner core

as if the forester did not sever
your trunk
in an attempt to save your life
leaving one branch
askew and tilting to the side
still green
still drawing nourishment
from the earth
from your roots
still reaching to the sky

each spring
you stand
unfurl your leaves
offer a spot of shade 
just to the side
of your slender
deeply scarred trunk

you look broken
yet you live
in full treeness

Day Five: Rocks

a poem a day in the month of may
(The Liminality Journal: Kaitlin Curtice)

Rocks carefully placed
decades ago, now disturbed.
A new plan emerges.

***

In the first days, 
when this house was fresh
and new, awaiting 
my particular imprint,
I created a garden
of rocks and stones
and periwinkle.

A small circle of stepping stones,
the center a terra cotta birdbath
surrounded by tiny purple flowers
amidst dark green foliage,
a border of rounded river rocks,
one etched with the word “trust.”

A failed water valve, an emergency,
hours and hours of poking,
digging, scanning —
the rocks now piled in awkward lumps,
the birdbath crumbled,
“trust” disappeared in the detritus
of what was. 

In the days to come, 
I will clear the ground,
discover what remains 
and open the portal 
to a new kind of wholeness.